Mornings with Dave & Jen

“Superpowers” We Don’t Really Have
“Superpowers” We Don’t Really Have

“Man of Steel” opened BIG this weekend…and I bet some moviegoers (you?) think you may already have these “superpowers” from Cracked.com…not so fast, my friend:

Influencing the outcome of sporting events.  If someone told you they could make the Yankees or Giants win with their mind, you would say they’re insane.  But that’s no different from wearing a lucky jersey, or not washing your socks during the playoffs.  Let’s face it…unless you’re PLAYING (or paying them NOT to play), your ifluence is ZERO!

Communicating with inanimate objects. You’d be surprised, but a LOT of people think they can talk to a car and get it to start…this goes for slot machines, too!  

Reading omens and signs.  People want to BELIEVE the universe is trying to tell them something:  You lock your keys in your car on the way to work, and that’s supposed to be some sort of message that you shouldn’t go.

Making bad things happen by joking about them.  Like when you wake up on a sunny day, and make a joke about rain, and suddenly someone wants to blame you for ruining their picnic.  If you could REALLY control future events, you’d be using them for more important stuff.  Like casting love spells on supermodels, or making yourself a billionaire.  That would REALLY be a superpower…which is why you don’t have it.

One can dream…

D&J

Dave & Jen Podcasts

kp

Hollywood Dirt Report

Hollywood Dirt: Details on Katy’s Super Bowl show

delivery man

FREAK Files

FREAK Files: What we hope “Brown” doesn’t do to you!

ts

Hollywood Dirt Report

Hollywood Dirt: Has Taylor been HACKED?

grumpycat

FREAK Files

FREAK Files: Zombie cat returns from the GRAVE!

samsmith1-620x400

Hollywood Dirt Report

Hollywood Dirt: Sam Smith has to pay it forward

More Podcasts

Recent Headlines

in Lifestyle

Forget wings and queso, veggies are most popular big game food

Fresh
veggietray

While the gladiators of the NFL are clashing in Phoenix, the titans of food will be fighting for supremacy at spreads across the country.

in Entertainment

Jeff Bridges hopes his new album puts fans to sleep

Fresh
jeffbridges

"The Big Lebowski" star has released "Sleeping Tapes," a project full of spoken word pieces and meditation mantras.

in Music

Justin Bieber begs forgiveness in nervous ‘Ellen’ interview

Fresh
11-overlay7

The pop star said he was leaving behind his "arrogant" and "conceited" attitude.

in Music, Entertainment

Katy Perry promises lions, sharks, and some singing at Super Bowl halftime

Fresh
katyperry

An unnamed "old school" female singer will show up as a surprise performer in addition to Perry and rocker Lenny Kravitz.

in Entertainment

Disney to introduce first Latina princess

aimee

Princess Elena of Avalor will be brought to life in an upcoming episode of "Sofia the First."