Well hello, world.
Taking a moment to come up for air, because, well, I didn’t know when I’d be able to again. Forgive me for the impending stream of consciousness that’s about to unfold, but being a bit delirious, I think that’s about all I’m capable of right now. I’m in full-blown baby mode.
As you well know at this point, I gave birth on Monday. Tuesday technically (12:13am), but the process began Monday morning. The process was nothing that I expected it to be. “Birth plans” be damned, all around. The baby books and sites tell you to write up these things in order to express how you want your birth experience to go down… but when it does go down, everything gets thrown right out the window, especially when those hellish contractions hit.
Everything that I thought and feared about labor (Pitocin, epidural…) turned out to be the exact things that made it smooth sailing for me. In fact, I ended up just about begging for the epidural after not progressing/dilating for 6 hours after induction. That was the one thing that helped my body relax and dilate so that I could progress to a smooth birth hours later. In fact, the actual ‘pushing’ and birthing phase of it was probably the easiest (and most empowering) part of the whole thing. I really feel like I’m up on a podium accepting an award, and should read my entire laundry list of thanks to The Midwives @ OBGYN Associates and the Cayuga Medical Center staff who I came into contact with, before the music starts and the hook comes out to pull me off-stage.
So here he is, Little Mr. Dante.. perfect in every way shape or form. I cannot believe I could create a piece of art this amazing in a million years.
It’s been an adjustment period at home… and I’m learning. Anthony’s learning. Dante’s trying to teach us. I’ve been without a good chunk of sleep for days now, and I’m getting to that point of second-guessing myself of if I’m “doing it right”, or “how am I going to do this when I go back to work?”, or “oh my God am I ever going to have time to shower without someone here ever again???”… but I’m trying. One day at a time. One feeding at a time. One sleepless night at a time.
And that is where we’ll leave it for right now. I just wanted to check in from the other side and say, “We made it!” Love to all.